Conversations During Cab Rides

Hi! How are you? It’s been so long since I’ve posted, I know, but with everything that’s been going on in my life right now there is just simply no time. However, I do get free moments here at work from time to time so I thought I’d post something quick today. I have three posts that I have been composing in my head; I will try to get that out next week. Next week I will tell you about San Luis Obispo, Yosemite, and the hike to Half Dome.

So earlier today I was looking for an old e-mail I sent out when I came across a real gem of a message from May 2007. I wrote it to my friend Erin while I was in Germany about a funny conversation on the cab ride home from work. It involved dogs and balls (ahem, not the kind you bounce up and down) and was hilarious at the time. I was working in Germany with three other girls, one of which was totally clueless about everything but not afraid to be really loud about it (we’ve all worked with people like that before, right?).

Anyway, I was sitting in the back of the cab with two other girls, Lisa* and Patty*, when we saw his dog with HUGE balls. Naturally, we were all shocked and intrigued: why was it so swollen, and more importantly, why was it so big? It was the size of a baseball on a dog no bigger than a Jack Russell. Lisa, Patty and I were wondering what the dog owner was doing to take care of this problem when the fourth girl named Debbie* piped up from the front seat. That was when the conversation got interesting and went like this:

Abby: Do you think that hurts?

Lisa: I would imagine, that thing is bigger than him.

Abby: I wonder what you do to get rid of it, surgery?

Debbie: I think you can just pop it, no? I know someone who popped it; you can get a doctor to do that.

Abby: I don't know if I'd use that doctor...

Cab Driver: I had a friend with that condition and he took medication.

Debbie: Why not just pop it? (Silence all around, mixed with disgust)

Debbie (to Cab Driver): Where was it on your friend? What body part?

(Uncomfortable silence in the back)

Cab Driver (to Debbie): His balls!

(At this point Lisa, Patty and I are laughing hysterically)

Debbie: Oh. What happened to him?

Cab Driver: Nothing. He took medication and he was fine. He's got two kids.

Debbie: Before or after?!

Cab Driver: He had kids before his condition.

Debbie: How did he fit into his pants then?

Cab Driver: I don't know, somehow he managed...

Abby: Debbie, what body part did you think it was on the dog?

Debbie: I thought it was on his leg!

Lisa: Debbie I think you need glasses, that was not his leg...

Cab Driver: Unless he has a fifth leg! (More laughs)

I swear I could not make this up. At one point I felt like Lisa and I had to be separated because we couldn't stop laughing the rest of the ride home. It definitely made for the most interesting cab ride EVER.

Just writing it down was really hard for me because it made me giggle. I had to leave the room twice just to finish the e-mail.

I hope that gave you a laugh! Now get back to work!!

* Names have been changed to protect the innocent. Also so they won't find out that I published our conversation online and that I refer to one of them as "Patty."